wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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