You made me cry and you don't even care
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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