I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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