You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
