you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
