belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I can't turn off my feet"
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
