I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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