And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
