Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
