If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
they're like a gay fantastic four
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
