so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize