Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize