I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
