i always forget guys have bellybuttons
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Randomize
