Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
