I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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