Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize