I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
