We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
