Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I am one with the molecules
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize