8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
