I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize