Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
now i know why i became what i already was.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
