don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize