If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
i've created a new STD.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Randomize
