Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
