oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
whose ass print is on the piano?
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize