He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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