So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
