im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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