11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
