How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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