Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Randomize
