I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
