My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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