Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Randomize