I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
