sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Randomize
