Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize