Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
