Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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