I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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