okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
