Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I just forgot I was standing up.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
