let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I can't trust your balls anymore.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
