By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
