let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
