Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Randomize
