First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
