That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Success! We fucked roommates!
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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